Weird flex, I know. But it makes sense.
On the boat, there were no other people. I couldn’t just go for a walk to the shops, or meet my friends at a cafe. I didn’t even have friends, because there are a pitiful amount of children on boats. When you do meet other boat kids, it’s tinged with impermanence- you’ll sail away in one direction, they’ll go another.
Wherever you travel, there’s no guarantee you’ll have the internet at home. And even if you do, boats are self-sustaining, making their own electricity to run the bare essentials, so there’s no guarantee you’ll have the electricity to power a laptop or TV.
So, you’re left to your own devices, with 0 social contact aside from your parents.
Now, as I’m locked in a house with my parents for the next 12 weeks, I can’t help but see the parallels. We can’t just go to the shops. We only have each other right now, in the physical sense. Going out for food is too big a risk right now, so we’re making do with our extensive supply of tins, pasta, and rice (some of which we actually had on the boat with us- maximum nostalgia factor, right?).
In fact, the circumstances right now are better than they were on the boat- I have Skype for my boyfriend (oh my god, I have a boyfriend!). I can instantly message all my friends (I know, I have friends!). I even have the entire internet at my disposal to learn new skills, procrastinate (what a blessing) and just generally wait out the apocalypse.
It’s strange to say my life has actually improved in a lot of ways since the quarantine began… Before, I had 0 motivation to do anything. I was always walking somewhere- to university, to a cafe, to buy junk food. I had an exercise bike in my room I’d paid good money for and hadn’t touched in months. Getting up was a laborious task, because it meant everything was just starting over again, and I was out of control of it.
Now, I’m my own boss. I can go online whenever’s convenient to look at my university lectures, I can wake up when I like, not when I need to (I can’t remember the last time that happened), and I’m on my bike every morning, practising Spanish on my phone while I do it.
For the first time since the boat, I have time to pause and think about what I really want from the future, from life. I have time to work on everything that took a back seat to university and socialising- my book, my blogs (hello there), and my mental/physical health.
I’m even practising make-up every day- before quarantine, this was almost a chore, a way of looking good for other people. Now, who am I looking good for? Me. I drew pink cherry blossoms on my cheeks the other day. Take that, society.
I feel a pressure to eat all the fresh food in the house before it goes off, and I’m breaking out a lot of the old boat recipes to do it- lentils, potatoes, and rice dishes are in full flow right now. Before the quarantine, my diet was packets of crisps and instant noodles because I was working so much I didn’t have time to cook properly.
My god, I even have a skin routine now. I haven’t had time for that crap since I was fifteen.
Being stuck in my room all day with an open window for company is giving me a lot of nostalgia for how I used to be. It isn’t the painful twinge of nostalgia I usually get when thinking about the boat and the old life; it’s more of a Hello, old friend.
Now, am I happy we’re in a pandemic? Hell no. I’d be on a plane to Malta right now to check out my future home and place of employment, if it wasn’t for this virus. I’d be moving out and starting my new life as a bona-fide adult. Instead, I’m drawing cherry blossoms on my cheeks and talking to the cat about the day- not exactly what I had in mind.
But there are good parts to being locked in a room with myself and my family, too. It’s an extreme change of lifestyle, but I find myself fitting into it like an old jacket I’d almost entirely forgotten about.
How are you adjusting to the quarantine? Let me know in the comments below.
Culturally Confused 